Why You Shouldn’t Visit That New Mom and Her Baby

Close your eyes and think about the last time you visited a brand new mom, either in the hospital or at home.  Did you call first? If you did, how long did you stay? Did you just sit there and hold the baby and ask about the delivery or did you do something useful, like the dishes?

Here’s a thought, the next time you hear about someone having a baby, let them have their (very short) time in the hospital to rest – they’re paying enough for it – and ask if you can come visit after they get home.  When you do visit, don’t sit on the couch and expect to be entertained by the new mom and her baby; clean something, bring a meal or something else useful, DO something.

Why? Because parenting is exhausting. Because it’s the best and worst thing in the world to have a new baby; no sleep, poop like you’ve never seen, breastfeeding alone can be hell. Throw having to entertain people you haven’t seen in months or years into the mix and it’s no wonder our young moms suffer from depression!

We pressure young mommies to do everything in a Pinterest-perfect way, including being ready to entertain the moment your child pops out.

STOP IT! She is learning to do the most important job in the world and no part of that job description includes entertaining you.

My sweet daughter is having a baby next month (we hope, but it could be April) and it breaks my heart to think she’ll have to go through what I did as I learned to do this mommy-thing. If you know her and plan to come visit, please don’t visit her in the hospital, please call ahead and please bring cleaning supplies.

Instead of shaming her, love on the new mommy you know! It will be the little thing you do for the betterment of our society’s mental health.

BTW, I would officially like to apologize to all the new moms I've foisted myself on over the years. I love you and you're awesome.

End of rant.

Here's some more stuff to read:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/randi-hutter-epstein/finally-a-strategy-to-help-prevent-postpartum-depression_b_9133504.html

http://semiproper.com/ways-to-help-a-new-mom/

http://www.scarymommy.com/rules-for-visiting-a-new-mom/

http://www.mommypotamus.com/18-ways-to-help-a-new-mom/

I’m 50. Now what?

So, I turned 50 in January. It was a wonderful birthday – the best I can remember for a long time – but in the aftermath, I'm sort of floundering.

I'm looking at myself and evaluating where I am, where I WISH I was, where I really want to be and how to get there.

In 2013, I joined a relationship marketing company, Nerium International.

At the time, I felt sort of hijacked into it (sorry Amy), but in the fall of that year I attended a national conference with my sweet friend, the aforementioned parenthetical, Amy, and fell in love with the company.  The product (at the time there was only one) was good for me – but my skin was already great (thanks Denlinger and Nies genes) and it hasn't changed much.  But, I've seen amazing results for other people, such as my husband:

              

. . . so I knew the results were real and, after that conference, I felt like there was a genuine chance that I could make something very big happen with Nerium.

Then came February of 2014.

I got fired. Again.

I’m not sure if whoever is reading this has ever been through the indignity of being sacked, but it’s not a pleasant experience.  I hadn't liked that job. I'd been looking for another one for many months, but it was still a difficult transition.

And yet.

God was SO good.  I needed to not be working. The timing was perfect.

·        My eldest daughter, Mary, was planning her wedding – May 24^th – and I would never have had the time to devote to that if I hadn't been let go.

·        There were several health issues that needed attention and I was able to play nursemaid to my family members as each needed me.

·        I attempted to work my Nerium business full-time but I’m not a brave person by nature and forming new relationships is out of my comfort zone. . .so that didn't work out so well.

And yet.

Eight months after I lost my job and two weeks after my unemployment ran out, I was called to work at UK through their temporary support office, S.T.E.P.S.!

After eight VERY dry months, when I'd applied for job after job and not had one call for an interview, I had FIVE interviews during the time I was serving at UK!

I started a job as a contractor through TEKSystems in November and it’s the best job I've had in a long time.  I’m so grateful for it. I’m making more money than I've EVER made (gone are the days I could mutter “They don't pay me enough for this” . . .) and, more importantly, I’m supported.  By my on-site supervisor. By the company through which I am contracting. I already know that I won't be asked to do anything my supervisor hasn’t okayed. And, a week after I started, when I tried to give notice so I could work closer to home and for a higher hourly rate, they increased the offer and allowed me to work from home every Friday! That has NEVER happened.  I’ve given two weeks’ notice countless times over the years. No one ever tried to get me to stay.  They want me here and I want to BE here!  It’ a heady feeling. . .

And yet.

We circle back to the birthday-thing.

This is not really where I'd pictured myself ending up.  Not that I'd ever really spent much time actually picturing my future. Truthfully, I've never been very introspective, nor have I been one to dream much.  I'm a day-to-day type person.  And now this.

How did I end up here? I’m not necessarily unhappy. I have a wonderful, loving, handsome husband to whom I have been married 28 years this year.  We have three beautiful, brilliant young-adult children and one amazing son-in-law. I have a home. I have a car that I don't have to share. (We've been pretty much major-car-repair free for the better part of 3 years.)  Life is good.

So why am I so unsettled?

Because I know in my heart I can do better.  Not as far as the people and things that surround me, but inside. My heart, spirit, soul . . . I'm somehow out of alignment.

This is the year.  I can't continue to say: “I'll do that later.”  It’s become a now or never thing.

This year I will lose (and learn to make the changes to keep off) that extra, oh, 40 pounds I've accumulated that’s neither healthy nor appealing. By eating less and moving more; by sticking to my WeightWatchers points and swimming 3 times a week and going to the yoga classes that are included in our Y membership.

This year I will be a successful entrepreneur – I will build back up to a team of 3 brand partners and 3 preferred customers . . . and MORE; I will earn a Lexus!  Before 2016!

This year I will work on myself.

I will be brave.

I will know myself.

I will like myself.

I will communicate love to those around me in tangible ways.

I will reflect the Jesus I profess to know.

I will be held accountable.  By you, friend reader.

In my first act of bravery, I invite you to ask me how I'm doing. With my weight loss. With my exercise. With my business. With my Jesus.

Please help me as I start to become a grown-up. I’ve been acting like a child for far too long. It's about time, because I'm 50.

Thanks in advance.

Love, K

REVIEW: The Daniel Cure: Over 75 Recipes & a 21-Day Devotional

I'll be honest. I have not done this fast -- yet.  I have been considering the Daniel Fast for a couple of years; ever since our friends did it and had wonderful results.  They felt better, lost a bit of weight and, from what I understand, had better results on their physicals at the doctor!

The book begins, appropriately enough, with an introduction to what the authors call, "The Daniel Cure" (hence, the name of the book) and an explanation of the Daniel Fast.

The fast is based on the story of Daniel in the Bible (see the book of Daniel -- go figure). Daniel and his friends are taken to Babylon as captives and brought to the palace.  When food was brought to them, it included things the Hebrews were told not to eat so Daniel, brave youth that he was, said,

12 “Test your servants for ten days; let us be given vegetables to eat and water to drink. 13 Then let our appearance and the appearance of the youths who eat the king's food be observed by you, and deal with your servants according to what you see.” Daniel 1:12-13

Funnily enough, Daniel and his friends were healthier after 10 days than the other captives. Whodathunk!

The second part of the book is crammed with health information.  Moving from a general explanation of your body, how it uses food and its status as a temple of a Holy God, to chapters on Obesity, Type 2 Diabetes, Cardiovascular disease and general inflammatory issues, it book sheds light on the health issues our country is facing. There are helpful tables with information about healthy cholesterol levels, Body Mass Index, obesity rates in the US, blood sugar ranges during fasting, and much more.

Part Three helps you prepare to start the Fast and adapt it for LIFE!  It's all well and good to do a 21-day fast and purge all of your free radicals, but a truly useful book helps you transition good eating into habit and lifestyle.  The authors do that; and more.

The fourth, fifth and sixth sections of this book provide recipes, a devotional for your journey and helpful Appendices with organizational tools and, saving the best for last for those who like these things, the science behind the Daniel Fast.

I think this book is perfect for someone looking for help with understanding how to both fast as a spiritual practice and for good health.  This book is written, first and foremost, as a guide to the spiritual practice of fasting; even though it seems the overwhelming bulk of it is about nutrition and food. There is a tone of education but also awe and reverence for a God who could make something as complex as the human body.

Anyone who is looking for a way to take a step toward a more healthy, God-honoring lifestyle will find this book extremely useful.

I'm going to ask my two remaining "chicks" - a 22-year old, working-two-jobs-and-going-to-college daughter and an 18-year-old soon-to-be-college-freshman-son and, of course, my wonderful husband to read this book and, together, we'll decide if we want to take this journey.  I hope the answer will be "yes."  It already is for me.

I received this book for free from http://booklookbloggers.com/ in exchange for my honest review.

Nearing Home: Life, Faith and Finishing Well by Rev. Billy Graham (2011)

I received a free Kindle copy of Nearing Home by Reverend Billy Graham in exchange for an honest review of the book.

It's taken me a while to get this review.  When I received it, yes, at least 3 YEARS ago, I wanted to read it but it didn't catch my interest and other things were going on. . . so I put it aside (electronically speaking).

I guess it was turning 50 a couple of weeks ago that has me interested in the text now but, for whatever reason, I'm so glad I picked it back up a couple of days ago.

For those who aren't familiar with Dr. Graham, here's a link to his bio on Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Graham.  Even if you ARE familiar with him, I suggest you mosey on over and read this, and wear your chinstrap, my mouth was in my lap while reading about his family . . . .

Anyway, Nearing Home is written by Dr. Graham as a sort of primer for those reaching retirement age -- or anyone who may EVER reach that age (read: anyone).  He aims his magnifying glass at those who are past 60 and uses scripture to back up his advice and teaching (as ever).  He urges:

• Planning - Do you have a retirement plan -- for your finances, your time, your spiritual growth? He also touches on Wills and Living Wills.
• Participation - Don't just sit back and do nothing, you'll get bored, find ways to live and participate in life; and
• Proclamation - God calls all ages to preach the gospel -- see Matthew 28:19-10. (Why yes, I am a Baptist, why do you ask?)

Nothing in this book is particularly earth-shattering but Dr. Graham is transparent in his struggles and triumphs with the issues he brings up and peppers his narrative with scripture and stories -- as any good grandfather would.

While not particularly timely for me, this book has been an excellent reminder that time does move faster than we think and before I know it, retirement age will be upon me.  I am forced to ask myself what my plan is . . . and if I don't have one, what will it be?  I recommend it as an "in-between" book  -- when you want something that will teach you a bit but you don't want to have to think too hard and you want to continue to respect the author when you're through.

Thank you Dr. Graham, for your life's service to the cause of Christ and for this book, what may be your final advice to a weary world.

You can find Nearing Home here: http://www.amazon.com/Nearing-Home-Finishing-Thorndike-Inspirational/dp/1594154465

What I'm doing now

In March of this year I was introduced to a new company: Nerium International. I started using their introductory product, Nerium AD, and LOVED it!  My good skin has become great.  The overlarge pores on my nose are now smaller, a scar I got when I was two years old, is disappearing before my eyes and I have a glow I have only experienced when pregnant. . .and I'm definitely not in that condition now.

I became an Independent Brand Partner and I'm excited about learning to be a Professional Network Marketer.  It's an amazing company -- very family-oriented, great professional development, an awesome opportunity to make my dreams come true.

Before (13 MAR 2013) and After (15 APR 2013)

My scar (13 MAR 2013)

My scar (15 APR 2013)

Before and after of my forehead . . . deep line above my eye is fading!

So . . . . I'm writing this blog to let you all know what I'm doing and let you know I'd love to show you a DVD about the product and/or the company.  Visit my website: www.knhamilton.nerium.com or e-mail me at k.n.hamilton2013@gmail.com.

My Review of Hipthong Two EcoTread Sandal (Men's)

Originally submitted at Rock Creek Outfitters

More than a flip, lighter weight than a ‘Z,’ the Hipthong Two is the perfect combination of both. Stretchy webbing cradles your instep, keeping pace with your every move. No flop in this flip, with Custom Adjust’em straps and our LUVSEAT™ platform for fit and alignment.

Hipthong Two EcoTread Sandal (Men's)

My new GO-TO shoe

By Kelly.theQueen from Lexington, KY on 8/6/2012

 

5out of 5

Pros: Comfortable, Well Made, Pretty

Best Uses: Every Day Wear, Outdoor work

I am not a sportswoman . .. but everyone I know has Chacos so I had to have some, too. I'm not sorry! I got them on sale and they are the most comfortable shoes I've worn in a while. I wear them as often as I can get away with it!

(legalese)

Deal

So, I am totally addicted to Groupon.  Here's a link you can use so I can get a $10 credit if you purchase one: http://www.groupon.com/r/uu20423221.  Today I bought this: http://www.groupon.com/deals/booth-no-5?c=dnb&p=2.  Can't wait to have a girls day with Mary and Sara!